Welcome to the review of the Billboard Hot 100, 28th September 2019. This segment looks at the top 40 songs charting in the United States of America. Because ‘Murica (F@#$ Yeah!). Seriously though, this has been a long time coming. Given the kind of attention the top 40 songs in Kenya articles get a lot of attention from US citizens, it is only fair if I also review the hot songs in their country.
The only thing that separates the US chart from the Kenyan one is that Billboard exists. The platform gives more accurate statistics of the top songs rather than Apple Music which is biased towards the users of the streaming platform. Perhaps a chart company will be founded in Kenya. It could be me. Who knows?
Before I begin, I have to credit B-Hop because he has been doing the top 40 reviews before this blog existed. You can check out his blog here.
The rules of the review are similar to the Kenyan chart; giving my opinions about every song and issuing a score from 1 to 10. If the song persists in the chart, I’ll only give the score next time. This segment will be done every two weeks so check your calendars for the next post.
All good? Let’s do this.
#40 NLE Choppa – Choppa: This song has the basic ingredients of a generic rap song: piano keys, 808s, and a rapper talking about how gangsta he is. Okay, cool. It’s funny how this song is actually topping the charts because I thought it would be an afterthought when I first heard it on YouTube. Oh well. 6/10
#39 Young Thug feat Gunna – Hot: As I mentioned in his debut album’s review, my opinion about trap music depends on my mood. This song was good when I was drafting the review but that isn’t true now. I do like Young Thug but I feel indifferent towards Gunna. The song is okay though. 7/10
#38 Jonas Brothers – Only Human: This song from their album Happiness Begins is all about having a good time dancing. Or having fun. It’s a feel-good song okay? I wouldn’t mind listening to it again. 8/10
#37 Polo G featuring Lil Tjay – Pop Out: The only thing that I like about this song is the beats. I didn’t care for anything else. Polo G and Lil Tjay are okay rappers. I wish I could say more but I can’t because all they talk about is guns, not messing with their squads and how they came from nothing. To be fair, I’m sure they do mean what they say but how many rappers talk about the same thing? 5/10
#36 Young Thug featuring J Cole & Travis Scott – The London: Long story short, Young Thug does what he does best and the same is true for J Cole (rapping better than everyone) and Travis Scott (auto-tune). Add all of that and you get The London. The results are mixed but if you’re like me who skips the song after J Cole does his verse, you won’t complain as much. 7.5/10
#35 Wale featuring Jeremih – On Chill: I genuinely like this song. Wale sounds so vulnerable here where he wants to make things right with his girl. I liked the delivery and beats. It gets better because Wale is about to release his sixth album in October. 8/10
#34 SHAED – Trampoline: This song has an interesting backstory. It was released a year ago but it is getting the attention it deserves now. “Deserve” might be a strong word to use here but it is a good song. I like how the electro-pop delivered in the production and the disturbing lyrics. Look at the chorus:
Wait if I’m on fire
How am I so deep in love?
When I dream of dying
I never feel so loved
#33 Post Malone – Saint Tropez: So, a review of Post’s new album is available for you to read. All opinions about the songs can be found there. Go and read it; I won’t repeat myself here. 7/10
#32 Halsey – Without Me: I have a conspiracy theory that tries to explain why this song is still high up in the charts. 2019 has been a year full of breakups. Because of that, people are jamming to this song to relieve the ache. Am I making sense?
Jokes aside, I still like this song. Halsey struck gold with this song. 9/10
#31 Post Malone – Hollywood’s Bleeding: Go read the review. 7/10. Next
#30 Sam Smith & Normani – Dancing with a stranger: I love this song. Why? Because I love Sam Smith and I do love Normani. She has always been my favorite girl in Fifth Harmony. Plus, their chemistry in this song is just amazing. Let me stop kissing bottoms. 😂 9/10
#29 Sam Smith – How Do You Sleep: Oh look, more kissing to do. While there is no denying that this is a good song, I can’t stand seeing IG music stories using this song. Find a new song ladies. Back to the song, how did y’all enjoy the choreography in the music video? I loved it. How can anyone not like this song? 9.2/10
#28 Saweetie – My Type: To be honest, I would’ve preferred Dipped in Ice to have been the song popping in the charts. My Type is just an okay song to me. I do like her flow and how she sampled Freek A Leek but it’s not the best song in the ICY EP. 7.8/10
#27 Quality Control featuring Lil Baby & DaBaby – Baby: I wonder how long it took them to come up with the name of the track. They didn’t have to think too hard. Anyway, the two artists are basically talking about themselves and the stuff they go through. Okay, cool. My only gripe is with Quality Control, the label that dropped that long and tedious 36-track compilation album. Quick question; how many of you actually listened to the whole record? How was it like? The song gets a 7/10.
#26 Post Malone featuring Dababy – Enemies: Read. The. Review. 7.5/10
#25 Blanco Brown – The Git Up: No words can describe how dumb this song is. Only gifs come close.
Just because Lil Nas X was able to come up with the song of 2019 doesn’t mean rap and country should co-exist for the foreseeable future. Just look at how Nu-metal fell off. What’s even worse is Blanco teaching us how to dance. Ugh. 4/10
#24 Post Malone – Wow: You know what I’m going to say. 6.5/10
#23 Shawn Mendes – If I can’t have you: I’m neither a fan of Shawn Mendes nor his music. So you can call it bias when I say I don’t really care about this song. It’s not a bad song but I’m not going to be listening to it any time soon. 7.8/10
#22 Megan Thee Stallion feat Ty Dolla $ign and Nicki Minaj – Hot Girl Summer: The song is great and all but I have two questions. One, was this collaboration between Megan and Nicki necessary? If so, why is Ty in this song? He just feels out of place in this song. That’s just my opinion. 8/10
#21 Taylor Swift – You Need To Calm Down: Just like Shawn Mendes, I really don’t care about Taylor Swift. That was quite evident in my review of her album. Again, it’s not a bad song but it’s not my cup of tea. 7.5/10
#20 DaBaby – Suge: Let me be honest, I don’t like this song. DaBaby is a great rapper but this song doesn’t do him justice. Let me just wait on his new album set to drop this weekend. It will give me a chance to see what he can do. 6/10
#19 Ariana Grande & Social House – Boyfriend: Ariana has been shoving songs down our throats for a year now and she isn’t done yet. In comes Boyfriend, a track that will relate well with Gen Z couples because the phrase “messed up” is the new normal for us. Other than it being relatable, the production is great and the chemistry between Ariana and Social House is awesome. 8/10
#18 Drake featuring Rick Ross – Money in the Grave: This song came out when the Raptors won the NBA Championship for the first time. Because Drake is the official Toronto spokesperson, he had to drop some tracks. This was one of them and it really matters to die-hard Drake fans than it does to me. Rick Ross delivers his usual luxury-rap verse and that’s about it. Just okay for me. 7/10
#17 Post Malone featuring Ozzy Ozbourne – Take what you want: Just do it. 7/10
#16 Ed Sheeran featuring Khalid – Beautiful People: My favorite song from his compilation album. Turns out people did hate it and here I am praising it for having some good songs. That’s because it does. 9/10
#15 Jonas Brothers – Sucker: Just okay. That’s all I can about it. I don’t think I’ll be listening to it any time soon. 7.5/10
#14 Post Malone & Swae Lee – Sunflower: This is an old song but it still slaps. 8.5/10
#13 Ariana Grande featuring Miley Cyrus and Lana Del Rey – Don’t Call Me Angel: It serves as one of the soundtracks for the upcoming Charlie Angels movie. It’s an all-female entourage here and the ladies show how aggressive they can be. The 808-heavy production is decent and women will enjoy it more than guys. Just okay. 7.5/10
#12 Khalid – Talk: The best song from his 50-50 album. Yeah, I don’t want to dwell on why I think it was so. Go and read the review here. What I do like about this song is how good it sound on my trusted pair of JBL headphones. It’s simply amazing. 9/10
#11 Ed Sheeran featuring Justin Bieber – I don’t care: Just like the title suggests, I don’t care for this song. It is so cheesy that it makes me wonder why people like this song. I feel like it’s the worst song in the compilation album. That’s saying something. 5/10
#10 Lil Nas X featuring Billy Ray Cyrus – Old Town Road (Remix): Yeeeeeah I’m gonna take my horse to the old town road and I’m gonna…Riiiiiiiiide till I can’t no more. I still love this song. Sorry. 9/10
#9 Post Malone – Circles: Hey, have you read the review? No? What are you waiting for? 7/10
#8 Post Malone – Goodbyes: I’m not going to repeat myself. 7/10
#7 Chris Brown featuring Drake – No Guidance: Chris Brown released a 32-track album a couple of months back and this is the only song that is making an impact. That begs the question, what’s the point of all those songs if only one song will do the heavy lifting? I just don’t get it. 8/10
#6 Lil Tecca – Ransom: Yeah, I won’t waste my time with him too. Read the review. Lil Tecca sounds like a nice guy but this song and the EP he released is a no for me. Sorry. 6/10
#5 Lil Nas X – Panini: Aggressive marketing. That is what this song has gone through. Let’s begin with the top quality music video with lots of product placement and Lil Nas X performing the song everywhere. It’s a decent track and seems to remove the one-hit-wonder status from him. However, it doesn’t change the fact that the EP was not good. 8/10
#4 Lewis Capaldi – Someone You Loved: Hey, have you gone through a bad breakup? This song is right for you. I’m not kidding, it got me in the feels too. Lewis sings this song with so much passion that it makes you conclude that he did have it rough in his breakup. Great song. 9/10
#3 Billie Eilish – Bad Guy: This and Bury a friend are my favorite tracks. Let us get one thing straight; her music isn’t that dark. Do you guys know Slipknot? 9/10
#2 Shawn Mendes & Camila Cabello – Senorita: Again, I’m not a fan of Shawn Mendes. I do like some of Camila’s songs but this is not one of them. I also don’t care that they are dating. All in all, the song does nothing for me. 7/10
#1 Lizzo – Truth Hurts: 2017. That’s the year this song came out and two years later, it is at the top of the Billboard Hot 100. I’m happy for her because she is an amazing artist but I can’t believe I never heard any of her songs until recently. Yes, I deserve a clown mask but so do all of you. Everyone except Keshie who knew about her and also did a review of her album. Anyway, I dig this song. It gives me that vibe even though the song is more empowering to women. It gets a 9.4/10
And it is a wrap! What did you think of the first Billboard Top 40 review? Let me know down below. Since you’re here, you can check out those reviews that I linked above and other music blogposts. You can also subscribe to the weekly newsletter where you get the latest posts and playlists to your email every Sunday. And speaking of playlists, listen to our new playlist, Pop in the Morning down below (Apple Music). The Spotify link is here. See ya.